Friday, January 29, 2010

karma's a bitch

because i miss being this care-free.

left more than half of my add maths paper blank and wrote nonsense for moral LOL
and now, i feel like someone punched me in the eye.
there's a like a bruise kinda pain whenever i blink hard or touch my eyelid :/
and pimple on the forehead, ew.
and chemistry file in front of me, double ew.
and i need to stay back the rest of the week *gags*
p/s: karma's a bitch only if you are. but maybe you don't even know what karma means *snorts*


officially be hatin' on tuesdays.
timetable is crappy. the only two lessons worth going to school for is english and chemistry.
and i have to stay back an extra hour for chemistry which ruins it .
so yeah, officially hating tuesdays from now on.
another load of homework to complete and everything is due on friday.
what is it with homework being needed to be handed in on fridays?
that sentence did not make sense, lack of sleep getting to my head.


thursday night. 11.46pm. drowning in homework.
chemistry, rumusan, add maths and history. all due tomorrow, fml.
and i have absolutely no mood to do it because i was just talking to meganbb about cheer and god, i miss it.
i feel like crying when i see you guys practice, okay?
and what you guys are doing, it hurts. but you most probably don't care because i'm such a bitch right?
cheer is/was my life. and i would do anything to be able to do it, right now.
but i have to wait till the end of the year. it's killing me.
having to put it on hold for a year, it's torturous murder.
say what you want, it's taking too much energy to care anymore.


1.08am, finally done with most of my homework.
i'm hungry.


i am sick and tired of you two acting like you're my friends.
seriously, if you don't like something i do, tell me. don't talk about it behind my back.
i'm the way i am and i am not changing for anyone.
people like me for who i am, if they don't, they can go screw themselves.
i know you don't like how i have mood swings or rages or how i have a really bad control over my temper.
this whole "i'm holier than thou" act is getting old.

on another note, it's friday.
a 3 day weekend.


i just realised how much of a mess my life is in school LOL

Friday, January 22, 2010

learning not to care

aspiring med students?
no, we're just a bunch of camwhoring teenagers.

starting off the week with a bang.
just got back from imu's open day and it was soooo fun :D
well, it was only fun because we kinda ogled over a 2nd-year dentistry student HAHA
who was extremely cute.
and i found him on facebook. i am such a stalker :/


it's still sunday but now my life is completely over.
i might not be going for SS2.
now, i shall go shrivel up and die.


tis tuesday and the whole awesomeness of the week just went down the drain ==
how stupid can people actually get? :/
i hope you hit your head. then maybe (somehow) a brain will miraculously grow.
woohoo, medical miracle/mystery?
and we found out today we have to stay back till 1.50pm every thursday.


i actually typed something here.
a mini rant. but apparently, freedom of speech on the internet is no longer possible without getting kicked in the ass some way or another.
stupid facebook drama that happened in school, ugh.
i thought today was a good day.
but i spoke too soon.
and i thought 2010 was going to be awesome.
spoke too soon again.
but then again, it is only the third week. it can get better.


ILTS or SS2 & C3?!
i hate making decisions like these because i want to go for both.
it's the end of the week.
wasn't a bad week but it wasn't good either.
lack of sleep, i hate it. stupid sleeping cycles ==

trying not to care has got to be the hardest thing a person ever has to do.

Horrible things do happen. Happiness in the face of all that? That's not the goal. Feeling the horrible and knowing you're not going to die from those feelings, that's the point.
- Dr.Wyatt, Grey's Anatomy


Friday, January 15, 2010

life, waylt?

because being in a very awkward position (and being caught on camera in that awkward position) with your best friend is so much better than what life is right now.

i'm thinking weekly posts.
i'll blog a few days and save it in the drafts and then publish at the end of the week.
posts might be extremely long but it's a good idea.
i don't care if you read it or not. it is my senior year and i will record whatever i want because it is my friggin senior year.
yes, good idea. i should do this.
starting now.


school, don't you just love to fml?
i hate you. pffft.
and i have to stay back for the next 4 days as well.
hello there exhaustion.


it is currently 12.56am on thursday night and i am still awake because i have a mountain of homework to finish eventhough i finished half of the pile yesterday.
i'm done with most of it, just 5 pages of history worksheets left.
this week has been a crappy week for me.
what with all the talking-behind-my-back-when-i-can-actually-see-what-you-said and school and MORE homework etc etc.
isn't my life just awesome? :D
but everything turned around when i found out that they'll be having a SS2 right here in kl!


it's finally the weekend, thank god.
i am exhausted and i have still got a ton of homework to complete.
intervensi starts on monday, le sigh.
imu's open day on sunday.
and apparently the whole SS2 thing might be a scam.
what a way to make my week miserable again ==

that's it for this week,

oh for the sweet love of shissus.
don't think i don't know that you actually don't like my attitude towards things.
don't think i don't know you guys talk about me behind my back, don't think i don't understand.
i am not a completely oblivious idiot.
so stop it, please.
stop excluding me. you obviously don't know what it feels like to be alone in a place full of people you know but don't exactly fit in with.
the way i go through life might be different but i am still a human with good intentions, most of the time anyway.
it's hard enough i don't have a close friend with me during these times of exclusion to actually talk to.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

well, screw you and what you think.

i am a human being.
i am not perfect. just like how you are not perfect.
i tried my best and i gave it my all.
you are still ungrateful. always have been, always will be.
screw you.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

internet = dangerous

because this cannot wait till my weekly updates on saturday (more on that in the post on saturday)
i will not mention any names here, it's just my thoughts on the subject.

the internet is a dangerous place, noh?
one single thing said wrong could lead to a whole bunch of other things.
yes, we do have freedom of speech but we have to know our boundaries.
the internet + somewhat freedom of speech has thrown my school into a kind of frenzy about a post that just happened to be on facebook.
obviously, i think the person who wrote the the comment is a total idiot (but he's still my friend so i still love him) but yeah, idiot through and through.

we tried defending ourselves by saying we had the freedom of speech but then a teacher pointed out the actual meaning of freedom of speech and all of us shut up.
we've been chastised by a few teachers already, we might even get more but that could be just an assumption.

because of all of this, my thoughts have totally changed about my school.
not just the student body, but everything about it.
so many changes (no, i'm not blaming anyone) that most of us don't like.
i repeat, i am not blaming anyone and i have no intention of hurting anyone's feelings.
everything is just totally messed up right now.
and now, we're all limiting ourselves to what we want to say.
life's a bitch :/


Saturday, January 9, 2010

first week of pwnage

siwon has a moustache, your argument is invalid.

first week of school over and done with.
i won't lie and say it totally tired me out but it was stressful.
the fact that i'm in form 5 and spm is just 300+ days away is gnawing at my brain right now.
i have my add maths books in front of me while i'm typing this and spamming tumblr with aznpurdyboiz.
i have another load of homework waiting to be done in my room as well as my wall of awesome which i have abandoned for about a week.

hectic schedules start next week and i'm still sick.
my body has yet to recognize my old sleeping patterns which irritates the hell out of me because i end up with my eyes half closed during the second half of school.

oh, looks like i DON'T have to stay back everyday.
just every tuesday, wednesday and friday.
which is still the majority of the week, but it's better than it being everyday, noh?

had my first breakdown of 2010 yesterday, fml.
yes, that is how stressful form 5 is.

p/s: expect more posts like this :)


Monday, January 4, 2010

because it's my last first day of school

and i shall do the whole "omg-first-day-of-school-must-blog" cliche thing.
needless to say, the first day was an absolute waste of time. as always.
but of course it got completely ruined when we found out that we now have to stay back till 2pm from every monday to thursday for only lord knows what.
and on wednesdays, from 12.40 to 2pm, we have this koko shit to do.
idek what to say because i can't grasp how they're going to get at least 500 students to cooperate to do koko when all of us want to go back home.
honestly ==

so, we had an almost two hour long assembly and i almost fell asleep standing up.
during last period, i actually fell asleep and the bell rang and my mind went "no, it's okay. it's not time to go back"
lessons start tomorrow, le sigh.

canteen is awesome now.
but a friggin bowl of noodles cost rm3, wtfe.
and i'm the only person in my group that takes the bus back lalala. should be fun.

kthxbai! (and dftba!)


i just realised this.
how come everyone's making such a big fuss about the first day of school? :/
it's never been this big before LOL

Sunday, January 3, 2010

holy shit

because it was the most decent one i did LOL

there's school in less than 24 hours.
my mind refuses to believe this.
i refuse to let myself believe this.
there is school tomorrow. FML.

it's my last year of school.
i'm sitting for spm in about 11 months.

but you know what?
i'm going to make this year count.


thanks to meganbb for the website. (top left hand corner, if you guys are wondering)